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Friendship Rules
- One Friend Rules: It's usually easy to have fun when you have
just one friend with you. This makes it not SO difficult to decide upon
special things to do. Be sure to listen to your friend's ideas, do many
of the things your friend wants to do (not just what you want to do), and
remember to be polite always.
- Two and Three Friends Rules: No groups are allowed! Remember
that you must play with all your friends. You can't decide you want to
be with one friend and ignore the other(s).
- Lots of Friends Rules: Groups can be a problem with lots of
friends, too. Sometimes groups get together and whisper. The groups may
act like they don't want to be with others. Maybe they'll call themselves
the "cool" group which means that everyone else must not be "cool."
It's okay, of course, if different friends talk with each other and do
things together, but it's not okay if they are nasty to each other or tell
others they can't be in their group. It's best to think of activities that
everyone can do together. Keep in mind, however, that it's not your fault
if some of the "friends" are being unkind to others. You must
remember to be kind to everyone and especially to those who are being left
out.
- Best Friend Rules: Although best friends can be so nice to have,
they can be problems, too. Sometimes people who say they are best friends
won't let others play with them. They might get together and whisper about
others. This really hurts people's feelings. Sometimes people just say
they are best friends so that they can tell others they don't want them
around. That's not what best friends should be. Best friends should be
nice to each other and to others also. One of the biggest problems of saying
you are best friends with someone is that maybe you or your best friend
won't want to continue being best friends. One of you might find another
best friend. That really hurts the one who still wants to be best friends!
So, Dr. Marsh suggests that you have lots of friends and not call anyone
a best friend!
- Things to always remember:
- Be nice to everyone, especially those others might think are, well,
you know, "uncool."
- Include others when you are playing. If someone comes up and asks to
join in, invite that person to be with you. If you're playing a game that
only so many can play, say something like, "We don't have any more
spaces for players now, but just stay with us, and we'll get you in during
the next game."
- Don't ignore others. Be aware that you can hurt others by not paying
attention to them. You may not realize you are ignoring them, so be really
careful to think about ALL those who are around you.
- Try not to whisper to your friends when others are around. Others will
think you are talking about them, and they will be hurt, even if you are
not talking about them.
- Don't tell secrets. As Benjamin Franklin said, "Three can keep
a secret if two of them are dead." That means that no one keeps secrets.
If you tell a friend something unkind about another friend, chances are
the one you spoke unkindly of will hear it and be very, very upset.
- Talk positively about others. Think of the good things about others
- Don't show off or brag in front of your friends.
- Keep in mind that even when you are with your friends, your parents
are still the bosses. You must always be respectful to your parents.
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