Act I; Scene 2
Mars Madness Continues

In this scene, you'll find the following additions to our character listing:

Teacher-Your teacher
Classmates #17- #26 - fill in names of your classmates or if you don't have this many students in your class, assign the parts to those who already have parts.
The Curtain-The actual or virtual stage curtain

Setting:

Please set the setting for Scene 2.
Here's a GC Hint <http://eis.jpl.nasa.gov/~skientz/little_rock/>

Curtain: (sitting on the floor, gets up as speaking, with a look of boredom) The curtain rises for Act 1, Scene 2 which thankfully is almost the last scene in this act.

GC: (in deepest authoritarian voice) We'll be taking one last walk about. All out again from Soujourner. (GC aside to audience) The Mars explorers climb out of Rover, but let's try to remember if they were in the Rover at the end of Scene I. If not, you'll have to reconstruct Scene 1, won't you? Or perhaps this one-whatever, one or two. It should all make complete sense, (hesitates and looks skyward at the Martian clouds-are there clouds to look at?) or should it?

Tires: (in deepest vocal gratitude): We hope you'll take a very long walk about and perhaps drop a few pounds each.

Classmate #17: I think we'd better check our spacesuits to make sure everything is functioning. Please examine the following parts: (fill in) GC Hint< http://heasarc.gsfc.nasa.gov/docs/StarChild/space_level2/spacesuit.html>

Classmate #1: (coughing) Am I breathing?

Classmate #18: Of course you are. But this Martian landscape must be interfering with your thinking. You appear to think you are not breathing when you are breathing. It's simply not logical.

Classmate #1: It's logical if you consider that we may be perhaps breathing virtually. And if it's virtual, it's probably not real and therefore, I must not be breathing, must I? (turns to audience and asks) Or maybe I don't need to breathe? Shall I choke and gasp for air once more? (is silent for a few seconds and then answers own question) No, I shall not. It is not a pleasant sight. Onward, GC.

GC: (aside to audience) The Great Computer Cheeseburger Play continues in spite of Classmate #1 whom we all hope will soon be captured by Martians.

Classmate #18: Have we lost our teacher? I haven't seen (fill in name) since our landing.

Classmate #19: I fear (she's/he's) allergic to rocks and remained in our spaceship.

Classmate #7:Spaceship, we didn't arrive in a spaceship, did we? Spaceships do not, I think, bounce. If (fill in name of teacher) has rock allergies, this is definitely not the place to be.

Classmate #20: No one's allergic to rocks.

Teacher: (trailing along at the back of the group, moves to the front, and says while giving one of those stern teacher stares at Classmate #20) I AM allergic to Martin rock dust, (slightly cough, cough), but I imagine we are all allergic to hot lava, which many of these rocks must have been at one time. AND-I have not been lost, except in thought. No one is ever lost, but we are often misplaced, aren't we? At least in our thinking. Or are we?

Classmate #21: (throws up arms without damaging anyone around) Hot lava. Yeowwww! We've better get out of here!

Classmate #5: The tires won't be able to stand the intense heat. We're doomed. (looks at the audience and moans loudly.)

Classmate #23: Such wimps. (Teacher's name) is talking about tens of thousands of years ago. Not now. Get under control. We are on a scientific expedition.

Classmate #3: I may be misplaced, too-by lava. Or replaced. Are the tires, tires or are they simply wheels of steel or metalic substance of some sort that will get us out of here?

Teacher: Ah, class, no need to worry. Think rocks. Rocks like Barnacle Bill and Yogi are most likely lava-type rocks. They are, however, covered with dust (sneezes loudly, but politely with handkerchief over nose and mouth, of course) and our scientific instruments (sniff, sniff) will have to allow for all this dust. Those students who wish extra credit, and Classmate #1, I suggest you need it, should examine our scientific data to uncover more details. GC Hint< http://quest.arc.nasa.gov/mars/ask/terrain-geo/Common_rock_types_on_Mars.txt>

Classmate #2: I'd be happy to check on this information as my mind will take it in better than most other minds.

Classmate #24: Yeah, right. You have a brain just like these rocks. Idle for at least ten thousand years or more.

GC: (in a very deep authoritarian voice) It's time to be gentler with each other, and almost time to return to our ship for return the rest of our journey.

Classmate #7: What ship? I reiterate we did not land in a space ship. It was either ethernet energy or a bouncy balloon.

Classmate #5: Do you think it will rain soon? We'd better get out of here before it floods again. There is definite evidence of previous flooding.

Classmate #24 Floods again? That's like worrying over the volcanoes. Do you know how long it's been since the last flood? I think that was (fill in).

Classmate #11: I'm still worried about my age. How old do you think I must be now? Have I had a birthday yet?

Great Computer: Time to head back to our Rover for blast off.

Classmate #25: (with a very worried look) I just thought of something depressing. I don't think the NASA scientists figured out a way for Soujourner to get back to earth.

Classmate: #5: No way back. I knew we were doomed. (sobs loudly again)

GC: (to audience) Allow them to stew a bit. Human worriers. Of course, they will get back, for they aren't actually here, are they? But our Rover is and it shall remain. How correct, then, is Classmate #25?

GC: I continue. Our Rover is now taking the student explorers back to the landing vehicle, which resembles (please fill in). Do you think it could possibly blast off? Perhaps it's best that this is a virtual trip.

Tires: (standing) We are here, but are we tires? No matter, there are greater concerns. This is both a joyous (look happily at audience) and a sad time (with a mournful look at audience). Joyous (happy countenances) it is to be rid of the (fill in) pounds of all those students. But, we'll be here all alone (sad countenances) with no connection to Earth. Left to be covered in dirty dust. A new Barnacle Bill. A younger Yogi. Here sits the once proud and regal Rover the First. Forever. (all sit down together looking left out)

Teacher: Students, enter the (hesitates), er, ship. Classmate #23, please check the sky and give me a report for our take off.

Classmate #23: (speaking like a weatherman describing the clouds) The sky looks (fill in). GC Hint< http://quest.arc.nasa.gov/mars/ask/weather/>

Teacher: Classmate #26, please check the latest Martian weather for us.

Classmate #26: (also like weather man) The forecast for (put in today's date) will be (fill in). GC Hint<http://quest.arc.nasa.gov/mars/ask/weather/>

Teacher: First the blastoff, then lunch. What would you like for lunch?

All: Cheeseburgers!

Tires: (pleading) Don't leave us here! (The ship blasts off or perhaps the balloon rises or the students are zipped through the Information Highway through webomotion.) I think we shall (estimate what will happen to little Rover). It's time to cry, but will anyone hear us? Ever. (tires sob loudly and wave good-bye and the space explorers eat lunch)

Curtain: (rushing across room or stage) The curtain closes on Scene 2 of Act 1 of "The Great Computer Cheeseburger Play" which has been, naturally, outstanding, but enormously sad. The curtain falls. (falls gently not touching anyone or hurting self).

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